Finding Balance

Recently I wrote about feeling overwhelmed with not achieving enough. Through out this past week I kept thinking about that same topic but wanted to dig into my own feelings and actions to figure out just why it was on my mind so much lately. I mean sure, I am always feeling like I could do more or do better because deep down I feel like I always need to prove myself. To feel worthy of others attention and love, but that is a topic for another day 😊.

I’ve always worked hard at my job to try and provide for my family and to move up the corporate ladder. I always have my eyes on the future and what the next steps will be or how I will get where I want. Its hard to know that somethings don’t always come on your own schedule or the path isn’t quite as smooth as you would like. But if you learn to enjoy the fact that the road isn’t smooth and that there may be different roads to the same destination you learn to enjoy the journey. This is a really hard thing to do of course, but a worthy challenge none the less.

If you read my recent blog posts you will also know that I’ve lost over 75 pounds and while most of the came from dieting. I’ve been trying to work out more to be healthier. On top of that, last year I was working a job that had me traveling way more than expected and I could see the toll it was taking on my kids. I never want my kids to feel like I choose work over them and that I wasn’t around enough to the point that they don’t feel loved. So I found a new job and just passed my 1 year with them a few weeks ago. The new job has been challenging but rewarding. The new challenges are exciting but like I always do, I’ve pushed myself to be better than expected to prove myself.

A new job, pushing myself to work out, trying to stay on my diet, trying to be a good father, trying to get back into reading, trying to push myself to be more outgoing, to make more friends, while wanting to write more often, wanting to start a business, wanting to run for public office and doing all of this while trying to be a present husband who helps out with housework, yard work, and everything else that normal people go through daily.  It all becomes a lost to handle at times.

As I’ve been looking reflecting recently, I realized that I haven’t been feeling balanced in everything I want. And when I list out everything, it is easy to see that trying to do everything all at the same time really isn’t possible. Do I want to slow down and only choose one thing at a time? Absolutely not, but I have to realize that I am not superman. No one can be all things all at once, nor should they expect themselves to be. Trying to do everything, will leave me off balance more and more, while also making it so that I can’t give any one thing my full attention. This doesn’t mean I can’t slowly work on different things, just that I need to be aware of the pressure I put on myself to rush through things and get them done as quickly as possible. Some of the greatest writers taking years and years to complete there works, the biggest businesses started off small, and long term weight loss takes times and commitment.

The best things don’t happen overnight and its important to apply that mindset in your everyday life. Learning patience is a challenge for me, but opening my eyes to a need of this, has helped me in ensuring I have balance in my life as well. By knowing that I don’t need to finish all of my projects or goals immediately, I can prioritize the most important things. Making a list of what is most important to you can help you choose what you want to focus on first. In the end, everything starts with a choice. Would you rather choose to be overwhelm yourself, get burnt out, and never accomplish your goals? Or would you rather, knock one or two things out of the park, feel an amazing sense of accomplishment, and then move on to new goals with fresh enthusiasm and new energy? I asked myself this very question and realized that I needed to take a step back and reset. I’ve kept up my diet, but I had to sacrifice my workouts for a short time.

For me, my family will always come first. Providing for them means I have to work my butt off in my job every day. My health will be at the top of my list as well because if I don’t stay healthy how will I continue to provide for them and live to see my kids grow up. While I took time off from working out, I am getting back into it knowing it is my choice. Writing has been cathartic and freeing. It is something I can do on my own time with no pressure as there are no deadlines. It is me putting my stories and thoughts out into the world to spread more positivity into the world. It is me realizing that I am not alone in everything I am feeling and that maybe by sharing my thoughts and experiences, it will help some going through the same thing.

These are the things I know I can do to feel accomplished and without feeling overwhelmed. I have so many things that I want to do with my life but I will not let the idea doing them all push me into being off balance with my family or my health. For me, my list will always be a long one for what I want out of this life. But for now, I choose balance. I am already thinking of what should be next on my priority list, but I am going into with a more open mind, and knowing that without balance I will not be successful. I am going into knowing, that it is okay to slow down, to take a break, and to reset my mind.  

If you are feeling overwhelmed or off balance in your life. I hope you do the something similar. Take a step back, evaluate what is the most important things in your life, what makes you happy, try to let everything else come together in its own time. Try and be present in your life and in the lives of those around you by being your best self and find solace in knowing that you aren’t alone. Realize it all starts with you and your choices. You can find balance and you accomplish everything you want, but you might not be able to accomplish it all at once.